DNI: pansexuals, will graham apologists, if you think taylor swift makes good music, you’ve ever compared literature to fanfiction, pickle-haters, you have the cilantro soap gene, you hate wasps, john green, cis people, you have straight hair, you hate the jock villagers in animal crossing, you don’t like salt and vinegar chips, you’ve never taken the bus, nintendo bootlickers, you have a normal attention span, or you don’t like green tea